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Ole Gunnar Solskjaer walks into a bank to cash a cheque. As he approaches the cashier he says, “Good morning, Ms could you please cash this cheque for me?”
Cashier:“It would be my pleasure. Could you please show me your ID?”
Solskjaer:“Truthfully, I did not bring my ID with me as I didn’t think there was any need to. I am Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, Manager of Manchester United”.
Cashier: “Yes, I know who you are, but with all the regulations and monitoring of the banks because of impostors and forgers and requirements of the legislation, etc., I must insist on seeing ID.”
Solskjaer: Just ask anyone here at the bank who I am and they will tell you. Everybody knows who I am.”
Cashier: “I am sorry, Mr Solskjaer but these are the bank rules and I must follow them.”
Solskjaer: “Come on please, I am urging you, please cash this cheque.”
Cashier: “Look sir, here is an example of what we can do. One day, Tiger Woods came into the bank without ID. To prove he was Tiger Woods he pulled out his putter and made a beautiful shot across the bank into a cup. With that shot we knew him to be Tiger Woods and cashed his cheque.”
“Another time, Andre Agassi came in without ID. He pulled out his tennis racket and made a fabulous shot where the tennis ball landed in my cup. With that shot we cashed his cheque. So, sir, what can you do to prove that it is you and only you?”Solskjaer stands there thinking and thinking and finally says, “Honestly, my mind is a total blank…there is nothing that comes to my mind. I can’t think of a single thing. I have absolutely no idea what to do. I don’t have a clue.”
Cashier: “Will that be large or small notes , Mr Solskjaer?”
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I said it at the time when Poch was sacked that they should have gone straight for him. Still can’t quite believe Ole survived after that
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“Anyway, I’m off to the cinema later, ready for a nice Halloween movie I think, “When Harry Met Salah!” sounds like it could be worth watching…”
That deserves to be turned into a viral joke that!
How about:
“I watched one of those spoof porn films last night, you know the ones where they take a famous movie and turn it into a porn film and the lead actress gets f#cked over time and time again.
It was called When Harry Met Salah”_____________________________
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for me, the choice between Chilwell and Shaw comes down to what formation you want to play. Chilwell is more of a liability at the back than Shaw, however offers far more going forward than Shaw. If Gareth plays 3 centre backs with wing backs I would go with Chilwell all day long. If he goes with a flatback four then Shaw.
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I’m gonna pull out my crystal ball here and say the parallels with Arteta will continue. Ole will beat Pool on the weekend and all will be forgotten for a few more months until the next fuck ups mount up too much.
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I mean, I see more negatives from that performance than I see positives. If Man U were a mid-table team I’d see that come-back as a positive. But Man U are expected to either win or come close to winning every comp they are competing in and going 2-0 down against a watered down Atalanta is inexcusable. That match sums up Man U this season
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anyone seeing parallels between Ole and Arteta other than the obvious? Pressure mounts, one or two games away from getting the sack and somehow pull out a win to save their skin and reset the sack counter.
Amazing that clubs of that size can get to that point
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We came from 2-0 down to beat Spartak Moscow 4-3. 4 goals for our new signing, Daka. Vardy not even selected
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I do think Utd are one workhorse defensive midfielder away from having a complete squad though. That defense gets no favours from your midfield. A Kalvin Philips or Ndidi would completely revamp that side. Ole still needs to go though, he’s a lost cause.
The Pogba dilemma playing well for France but shit for club I think all comes down to one difference. Kante! For France, Pogba feels like he can shun his defensive duties because he knows Kante will do the work of two men. Utd simply do not have that type of mobile defensive mid. All this talk of bringing Rice in is completely off the mark, imo. He would not add to what you already have there. The team needs a workhorse!_____________________________
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Completely agree Ed. I was quietly confident when I saw our starting lineup with Evans back. This was a our strongest starting XI all season (even with Ndidi out).
I’m baffled how he has had this amount of time AND this amount of money. He is utterly clueless tactically and I mean that literally. I would rate every other manager in the league better than Ole with tactics._____________________________
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Fucking YES!
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I’m worried now with Evans going off and Vestergard coming on. He’s been awful so far
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To be fair, I think we’ve been the better team over the 80 mins so far
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He’s been our best player so far this season. Because Maddison has been so shit and not starting he’s mostly been played as the 10 and he’s just been unreal in that role. The deeper he plays for us the more work he has to do and less creative he can be
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Believe it or not, this is the strongest XI we’ve been able to field all season. Very surprised by the Utd tactics so far. Giving us so much space
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I thought they were looking pretty good before they sacked the last one. I could have seen them surviving easily.
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yep, he’s an embarrassment to professional footballers looking like that. Disgraceful!
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they really do need to change that stupid offside rule. The Watford player tries to make the interception purely because the Liverpool player is in behind. He can’t possibly know he is offside. If that player is not there, the Watford player just lets it go for a goal kick.
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Fuck me! Has Danny Rose spent the international break eating pies????
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I think everyone needs to calm their shit a bit. I mean just because you’ve got the money, doesn’t mean you’re necessarily going to flaunt it. Supposedly our owners have more money than Liverpool’s but we’re certainly not outspending them. Supposedly Barnsley’s, Fulham’s and QPR’s owners are all worth more individually than Liverpool and Arsenal put togther! Did Fulham break the bank last time they were in the PL? From memory they did the complete opposite and actually loaned a shit load of players.
I can really see Mbappe wanting to live on the Tyne!
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